Confuse between two souls :(

Have you ever had the feelings where you're confuse between two people? I mean confuse as in you're not sure which one to like/love. I'm having that feeling now. Between who? Between Jessica and the girl I met on twitter, Kimberly. *sigh* I love Jessica, I really do but I don't get why we don't talk anymore. She never email me back or call me. I emailed her many times but there's just no reply back from her. It makes me think that does she really want to be with me? Have she been playing with my feelings all this time? I think too much until I dreamed about her few days ago. It was more like a nightmare. I dreamed that she was married to this guy. To a guy?! Now thats just wrong..coz she's..well a lesbian. And our son, Gabriel, she lied to me about that and it turns out the baby was hers and the guy. That dream look so real, I literally cry. And if you vice versa the dream, she would be married to a girl and the baby is theirs. OMG! This is so sad. Arghhh! I hate crying! I feel like I'm going to lose her soon, or I'm already losing her. Gah! Jace, don't think too much! Moving on to Kimberly, I met her on twitter, she followed me first. We start really talking in September during my college break. We talked about cigs and stuff. But as days passed, we started to flirt. It was just a silly flirting but it kinda build up to something. For me, I kinda started to like her for real. She's a Sarawakian though. So, I came up with this idea and ask her to be my gf for a week and boy that was the best one week of my life. We continue though..she told me that she really like me. I don't know if she really mean it or not. OMG I GOTTA TAKE THAT BARCARDI BOTTLE UP IN THE SHELF, I NEED A SHOT! Lol, sorry that was random but I really need at least one shot. Ooh ooh, I saw someone's bio and she state that GO OUT AND GET LAID. I was on twitter while blogging, hehe. Ok, back to my situation. I'm so confuse now..I'm emotionally attached to both. I can't be with Kim because she has a boyfriend and I might not be with Jessica because she lives in Tennessee. THE BIG PROBLEM IS..WHY CAN'T I FIND SOMEONE WHO IS NEAR TO ME..LIKE IN SABAH FOR INSTANCE??? Ugh! I hate this feelings. But, i'm pretty sure that I want to be with Jessica and only her. I really love her more than anything in this world. *sigh* it feels like I'm giving up. Let's just see what happen....